It's that time of year again: my birthday. I've blogged about age in the past. Once last year, several months after my birthday, I wrote a post titled The years of age. At the time I was inspired by the beautiful weather and the delicious beer in my hand. I was thinking about my health status and how time was slowly starting to change me. Two days later, Lily was born.
If I hadn't changed before then, I've definitely changed now. Back in 2013 I blogged the day after my birthday, in a post titled Achieved another year, reflecting upon birthday cliches and traditions. That was when I didn't feel any older.
This year I feel older. Maybe it is fatherhood and all the responsibilities associated with it. I'm certain that's part of it. But I can pinpoint exactly where the feeling originates. It's the joy I get from seeing Lily progress and incrementally change. I'm sure this feeling of joy is relateable for all parents as they watch their children grow and develop.
It's like last week when I was making dinner in the kitchen and Lily was playing on the floor. She had her favorite toys that always keep her occupied. This particular evening she wanted nothing to do with those toys. She had, only a week earlier, perfected the art of quick momentum from one thing that peaked her interest to the other. Now she was interested in one of the bottom kitchen cabinet drawers, happily grabbing the knob, troubleshooting how to pull it. Determinedly, she was able to inch it open, dip her tiny hands inside, and wiggle out the corn cob trays. Those trays were her new fascination as she tossed them around the kitchen floor.
The corn cob tray moments bring me more joy than I can describe. The corn cob tray moments are the happiest moments I've had in a very long time. Yet the corn cob tray moments are the realization that time is passing by so very quickly. These corn cob tray moments are the moments I've pinpointed that make me feel older.
In seeing each variation in Lily's development, I see myself older and changing along with her. She is the catalyst transforming me. Basically fatherhood has made me soft and mushy. It's flipped my world in ways unimaginable. This all makes me feel age like I've never felt it before. So to celebrate these new found feelings, I'm documenting these reflective thoughts with a birthday blog post and a birthday beer. Cheers to more years of age.